All The Things You Need A Licence For In The YooKay

Do we really need fishing rod licences? In many circumstances, licencing is a crucial control mechanism, like the issuance of visas to approach the border. They also make a lot of cash to spend on other stupid nonsense or for paying Bamalian benefits. But when they become numerous and onerous, bureaucracy becomes the point of maintaining them. Transporting radioactive waste is a perfectly reasonable thing to control, given the potential for a serious public health injury if a truck overturns.

But fishing rods? Eggs? Dietitians? Are we overrun with people wanting to start safari parks?

You can browse all these at the helpful "Find a Licence" page on the government website. It's like shopping, but worse. This helpful resource is for the poor hapless soul who has been told he can't actually sell raw milk from his cow and must ask the state's permission – for a fee.

Many of these are sensible. Most of them are not. Even the Foreign Secretary was recently accused of "fishing without a licence" next to the Vice President of the United States.

Social care & childcare

• Act as an adoption service manager (England, Wales)
• Act as an adult care home manager (England, Wales)
• Act as a fostering service manager (Wales)
• Act as a residential childcare manager (Wales)
• Act as a social worker (England, Scotland, Wales, Northern Ireland)
• Provide an adult placement service (Wales)
• Provide adult social care services (Northern Ireland)
• Provide a children’s home (England, Northern Ireland)
• Provide secure or supported accommodation for children (England)
• Provide children’s residential services (Northern Ireland)
• Provide a domiciliary care agency (Northern Ireland)
• Provide a nursing agency (Northern Ireland)
• Provide a residential care home (Northern Ireland)
• Register as a foster carer
• Register as a childminder
• Register a children’s day care service (Northern Ireland)
• Register a day care of children service (Scotland)
• Register a nursery or day nursery
• Provide childcare (England)

Healthcare professions

• Practise as an art therapist
• Practise as a biomedical scientist
• Practise as a chiropodist or podiatrist
• Practise as a clinical scientist
• Practise as a dietitian
• Practise as a hearing aid dispenser
• Practise as an occupational therapist
• Practise as an operating department practitioner
• Practise as an orthoptist
• Practise as a paramedic
• Practise as a physiotherapist
• Practise as a practitioner psychologist
• Practise as a prosthetist or orthotist
• Practise as a radiographer
• Practise as a speech and language therapist
• Work as a nurse or midwife
• Work as a doctor
• Work as a dentist or dental care professional
• Work as a pharmacist or pharmacy technician
• Provide private healthcare services

Education & training

• Teach in a state school (England, Scotland, Wales, Northern Ireland)
• Run an independent school (England, Scotland, Wales)
• Provide adventure activities for under-18s (England, Scotland, Wales)

Driving & transport

• Work as a driving instructor
• Operate as a driving examiner
• Run a driving school
• Provide HGV driver training
• Provide motorcycle rider training
• Provide passenger carrying vehicle driver training
• Work as a taxi or private hire driver
• Operate a taxi or private hire business
• Drive a bus or coach professionally
• Drive an HGV professionally
• Run a bus or coach company
• Operate a goods vehicle operator business
• Transport animals commercially
• Transport dangerous goods
• Transport radioactive material

Aviation

• Fly an aircraft
• Work as an air traffic controller
• Maintain aircraft as an engineer
• Operate an airline
• Provide aviation security services

Alcohol, entertainment & gambling

• Sell alcohol
• Apply for a personal alcohol licence
• Apply for a premises alcohol licence
• Provide late night refreshment
• Provide regulated entertainment
• Hold a temporary event with alcohol or entertainment
• Provide gambling facilities
• Run a betting shop
• Run a bingo hall
• Run a casino
• Run a lottery
• Operate remote gambling
• Operate gaming machines
• Supply or manufacture gaming machines
• Operate amusement arcades or gaming centres

Explosives, fireworks & firearms

• Manufacture fireworks
• Store fireworks
• Sell fireworks
• Use fireworks professionally
• Manufacture explosives
• Store explosives
• Sell explosives
• Import or export explosives
• Transport explosives
• Use explosives professionally
• Work as a shot firer
• Manufacture firearms
• Sell firearms
• Import or export firearms
• Possess firearms
• Possess shotguns
• Possess restricted weapons
• Deal in firearms
• Act as a gunsmith
• Run a shooting club or rifle range
• Carry out clay pigeon shooting
• Possess ammunition
• Manufacture ammunition
• Sell ammunition
• Import or export ammunition
• Transport or store ammunition
• Collect firearms or ammunition (collector’s licence)
• Deactivate firearms
• Operate a museum holding firearms
• Use firearms for pest control or deer stalking
• Use firearms for humane dispatch of animals
• Use starting pistols
• Use or manufacture imitation firearms
• Deal in air weapons (Scotland, Northern Ireland)
• Possess air weapons (Scotland, Northern Ireland)T
• Operate armed security services

Animals

• Keep animals for boarding
• Keep animals for breeding
• Keep animals for exhibiting
• Keep a pet shop
• Run an animal sanctuary (England)
• Run a riding school
• Hire out horses
• Keep dangerous wild animals
• Run a zoo
• Run a safari park
• Run a circus with animals (restricted)
• Run a slaughterhouse
• Export or import live animals
• Fish with a rod and line
• Fish commercially at sea
• Catch shellfish commercially
• Catch salmon, sea trout, or eels
• Hunt wild animals with dogs (England, Wales)
• Shoot game birds or deer
• Cull wild birds, badgers (England, Wales), or seals (Scotland)
• Trade in endangered species

Food & farming

• Run a food business
• Prepare or process meat for sale
• Sell fish or shellfish
• Sell dairy products
• Sell raw milk (England, Wales, Northern Ireland)
• Sell eggs
• Import or export food
• Manufacture or sell animal feed
• Transport food commercially

Waste & environment

• Run a waste management business
• Collect, carry, treat, or dispose of waste
• Export or import waste
• Manage hazardous waste
• Operate a landfill or incinerator
• Operate a waste transfer station or scrap yard
• Deal in waste electrical equipment
• Deal in ozone-depleting substances
• Deal in fluorinated greenhouse gases
• Abstract water
• Discharge water or effluent
• Build or operate a reservoir
• Build flood defences or carry out river works
• Use water for irrigation
• Drill a borehole

Energy, oil, gas & mining

• Generate, distribute or supply electricity
• Generate heat for district heating
• Act as an energy assessor
• Certify energy performance of buildings
• Supply, transport, or store gas
• Install gas appliances
• Work as a gas engineer
• Sell, import, or export coal
• Explore, drill, produce, refine, store, import, or export oil
• Explore, drill, produce, store, import, or export natural gas
• Explore, drill, or operate geothermal energy sites
• Explore or store carbon dioxide
• Explore, mine, quarry, process, import, or export minerals
• Extract coal, stone, sand, gravel, clay, chalk, salt, potash, gypsum
• Work offshore in extraction or renewable energy
• Build or dismantle offshore structures
• Lay submarine pipelines or cables
• Carry out dredging or marine construction

Radioactive & hazardous materials

• Use, store, transport, or dispose of radioactive substances
• Import or export radioactive substances
• Operate or decommission a nuclear installation
• Work with, remove, transport, or dispose of asbestos
• Manufacture, import, export, store, transport, or dispose of chemicals
• Use, sell, import, or export pesticides
• Manufacture, sell, import, export, store, or transport fertilisers

Pharmaceuticals & medical

• Manufacture or sell pharmaceuticals
• Import or export pharmaceuticals
• Conduct clinical trials
• Manufacture or sell medical devices
• Import or export medical devices
• Operate a private hospital or clinic
• Operate a dental practice
• Operate a pharmacy
• Operate an optical business
• Provide veterinary services or run a veterinary practice
• Manufacture, sell, import, or export veterinary medicines
• Operate a blood or tissue establishment, stem cell bank, or fertility clinic
• Provide surrogacy services (Northern Ireland, Scotland)
• Provide adoption or fostering services (UK-wide)

Funerals & human tissue

• Operate a crematorium or cemetery
• Carry out burials at sea
• Operate a funeral director business
• Import or export human remains or human tissue

Personal services

• Provide body piercing, tattooing, cosmetic piercing, electrolysis, acupuncture, massage, or cosmetic surgery
• Provide hairdressing or beauty treatments (Northern Ireland)

Media & communications

• Operate a television channel
• Operate a radio station
• Provide on-demand programme services
• Provide telecommunications services
• Operate a postal or courier service

Charities & public space

• Run a charity
• Collect charitable donations in public or house to house
• Conduct street trading
• Operate a market stall or street café
• Put tables, chairs, scaffolding, hoardings, or skips on a highway
• Carry out roadworks or construction affecting highways
• Put up a temporary structure or marquee for an event
• Close a road, hold a street party, procession, or demonstration
• Film in public spaces (licensed areas)

Security

• Operate a private security business
• Work as a security guard, door supervisor, close protection operative, CCTV operator, cash-in-transit guard, or key holder
• Work as an investigator (pending implementation)

Tobacco & products

• Sell tobacco
• Import or export tobacco
• Sell nicotine inhaling products

Cultural goods

• Export or import cultural goods (art, artefacts, historic weapons)
• Trade in ivory (exceptions)
• Sell seal products (exceptions)

For our friends drafting the Great Repeal, 400+ of these need to go, with prejudice, fast.